A visit from Sir Sven A Claus

A visit from Sir Sven A Claus

(Twas the night before Twelfth night)

Twas the night before twelfth night and all thru the Kingdom

People celebrated their holidays be they Christian or Klingon

The shields were all lined up by camp walls with care

In hopes that Sir Sven-a-Claus soon would be there

The Archers were nestled all snug in their beds

While visions of spear-gods danced in their heads

Fighters snuggled in armor and heavy steel caps

As they staggered to their yurts for a long winter’s nap

When out on the battlefield arose such a clatter

I sprang from my period bed to see what was the matter

Away past the privies, I flew like a flash

Tripping over tent lines, in the mud I did splash

But what to my bleary eyes, in the darkness appeared

But a mighty Caid shield wall, all bristling with spears!

They roared onto the field with nary a pause

Led by the King, Sir Sven-o-Claus

More rapid than beagles, his Knights they all came,

He whistled and shouted, and called them by name!

Now Guillaume! Now Drogo, Now Gerhardt and Dietrich,

Sir’ Edward, Sir Edric, and my Lovely Kolfinna

Go past Resurrection, and Keep up with Jamaal!,

Now smash away, smash away, smash away all!

For out of the darkness the foemen appeared

It was those sneaky Atenveldters with all of their gear

Right through the enemy our column charge flew

But soon they were surrounded, Sir Sven-a-clause too!

But in the night air, I heard a loud twang!

And a new Aten shield wall collapsed with a bang!

For though we were outnumbered ten-thousand to one

Sven-o-Clause had brought Siege, and some Archers for fun!

For midnight attacks, he had the perfect solution

Because we all know how the Aten’s love “Air-Pollution”

The camps they erupted, warbands put down their “root-beers”

And they ran for the field with yell’s and with cheers

Oh, How the King battled, with flat snaps and with raps

Oh, How The Knights held the line with n’ary a gap!

As we all ran to join them, shouting with Glee,

I heard Sir Sven-a-Claus cry, “To Me! To Me!

His eyes were a twinkling, his sword swift and final

As it spun in an arc, and killed off a rhino

With a wink of his eye, as he thrust to a head

I soon came to know that I had nothing to dread

He spoke not a word, but kept to his work

And he laid out a shield man who was being a jerk

Then waving his sword, high up over his head

He called all his forces as the enemy fled

The brave warriors cheered, because winning is fun!

As they marched off en-masse to find some drinks and some drums

I heard Sir Sven-a-Claus exclaim, as they headed into the night

“Cheese Pizza’s to all, and to all, A Good Fight!”

For Sir Sven, 12th Night 2008

By THL Thomas Whitehart